In ubiquitous environments an increasing number of sensors capture information on users and at the same time an increasing number of actuators are available to present information to users. This vast capturing of information potentially enables the system to adapt to the users. At the same time the system might violate the users' privacy by capturing information that the users do not want to share, and the system might disrupt the users by being too obtrusive in its adaptation or information supply. In this paper we present CoDaMine - a novel approach for providing users with system - generated feedback and control in ubiquitous environments giving them the freedom they need while reducing their effort. Basically, CoDaMine captures and analyses the users' online communication to learn about their social relationships in order to provide them with recommendations for inter-personal privacy and trust management.